That is exactly why I was attracted to Steve. Steve is always the Golden Boy (a nickname he got while working at the company we met at). I saw only that piece of him. Like Amber I looked to him to be the man of constants and stability that had been lacking in all my other relationships. What I did not do was look to him for the mystery and excitement that was in the other relationships.
In my youth I must have correlated the two to be mutual exclusive. You were either the good boy who was going to provide for me but leave me wanting for excitement or you would be the bad boy who would be exciting but leave me in the end. This separation made it easy to justify friendships with others that were unhealthy for our marriage.
"I needed both" I would say. Never looking deeper into my husband's personality to see the mystery there, the passion that he just didn't know how to release. After 11 years of marriage I am just starting to see the true Steve emerge. He is no longer the Golden Boy, but he is not the Bad Boy either. He is my Husband, man of mystery.
I always do enjoy a good mystery.